I wonder what I'm living for.
In Paper Towns Margo says how people are always doing things for the future. So when my history teacher asked me why I went to school and I said, "I went to elementary school to prepare for middle school to prepare for high school to prepare for college to get a job so my kids, if I have kids can go to a good school and do the same thing" and he said it was "way out there" I felt a little like a salt shaker must feel when a tablecloth is whipped out from under him (basic similies taking place here).
I don't know what, who, where I want to be when I grow up. Will I live in a condo? Will I work for Wall Street? Will I be a social service worker? A cop? A receptional? A waitress? Your guess is as good as mine.
Sometimes it's nice to have certainties. Change is good, but everyone changing all at once is decapitating.
Like, for instance, it would be nice if I had an opinion in this blog post. But some things just never happen.
edit: decapitating was not the right word. disabling? disconcerting? disacating (is not a word)? dessapating...nope...
edit: It is November 31 2009. The word was disorienting.
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1 comment:
Hmm.
You know, the same thing sort of occurred to me before, like with how you just prepare for the next thing in society, but that's for the next thing and so on. Maybe, like you said, it's nice to have certainties like that but then we all just sort of have different... journeys between and during the stops. Not to take away from your.. unique, awesome and deep thinking or nothing.
Somehow things just fall in place, whether from force or just a flow I guess. Maybe you'll be a person who wonders who they are...?
No offense intended. Never.
But... I liked this post a lot. You seem to know just how to say stuff to get everyone thinking. Glad I know you.
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